One Whole Week In The Life Of...

DAY ONE : Wednesday, 18:00

I kept this blank page for a week

Sitting atop my paperwork and stuff,

Waited for this moment right here

To declare to whoever dares to hear:

I'm announcing the ending of "old me"

And the beginning of a brand new identity,

One I've forged from pure effort of will

I'll be heard and seen, yet calm and still.

As I rise up before your very eyes,

Surprising many, but not noticing as I'm busy

Creating a whole new mindset, so I can get

From low to high without unnecessary upset.

Ya' get me?

Don't worry if this all sounds like bullshit,

Just watch me grow and don't forget

I said all this right here, no retreat, no regret.

R. C. Greenlow

[31.07.2019]

DAY TWO : Thursday, 02:07

Forging a path in the total darkness

Comes easily to neither man nor beast,

Requiring reliance on instinct and belief

In the power of will, that lies deep beneath

All the layers of conditioning and self-doubt,

Outside the walls built around and inside us,

Beyond even consciousness, words and thoughts.

The realm of undiluted truths, mysterious,

Yet as fundamentally real and interconnected

As atoms, molecules, quarks and electrons,

Contains secrets that those who choose both

Good and evil ways are dying to tap into…

There be dragons in them there hills though,

So be extraordinarily care3ful you don't go

Too close, too soon, to things not intended

For humans to discover, unguided and unprotected.

R. C. Greenlow

[01.08.2019]

DAY THREE : Wednesday, 05:11

I've been bad.

I'm extremely sad to say,

With burning tears streaked upon cheeks,

That I've weakened and gone astray…

Not what you may think,

Not drugs or women, but drink

And lack of food and sleep,

Making me fall back to being a sheep.

Burying one's head in quicksand

Leaves mud in mouth and ears,

Please forgive me, I wasn't hearing

The nearing disaster upon us…

But worry not my love,

I've dragged myself back

From the edge of dark black,

And found the light deeply within.

All I want is you, happy you,

No more upset at where I'm going

Or what I'm doing, 'cos darling

I'm only ever choosing you.

I never chose to leave, I fled

'Cos my bile and anger bled

Out my mouth and the pores of my skin,

And no way could I let that be happening.

R. C. Greenlow

[07.08.2019]

DAY FOUR : Thursday, 00:29

New day yesterday without a doubt!

No stressing out, not a single shout.

Help arriving from several sides,

Emotions bubble as away fear slides,

Replaced by unexpected relief

From somewhere buried deep beneath

The shared nightmare that has been life,

My outpouring bottled up anger and strife.

Back from the brink, that's all I can think.

I was drinking too much, overthinking,

Sinking further and deeper into the quagmire

Of collected up pain from a time long expired.

I'm amazed you didn't just leave and retire

From fighting me, feeling my raging fire

You’re totally depleted, yet love's not deleted

Because my wife, I may be like a fool but I’m no liar.

My strength was found only when I clung

To the edge of the last rung of sanity's ladder,

Madder than mad and rapidly going insane

Yet somehow, some way, I got through my pain.

Such a crying shame the cost has been so high.

We somehow have to try to rise and rebuild our lives

Individually, as a couple and a functioning family,

I know the terrible trouble has all been down to me.

My lovely children, my absolute angel of a wife,

I've been fighting just to survive pretty much all my life

And though it's so hard to go from that to thriving,

It's simply no longer enough just to be surviving.

I'll do it for you all and myself, just need faith and time

To learn to hear every syllable of my inner voice, line by line

And embrace and nurture and heal what burns inside me

I will put out this fire for the sake of our whole family.

R. C. Greenlow

[08.08.2019]

DAY FIVE : Saturday, 02:55

I love the still tranquil quiet at night,

‘Cos where I live in daytime it’s so noisy and shite.

The wee small hours provide showers of equanimity

That calm and embalm me in peace and harmony.

Daytime, mate, a road bustling with rude people

And non-thinkers tooting horns for no good reason.

I’m at the point where I keep having to leave here,

Just to escape the drivel of this fuckin’ street.

Oh, for a house in the suburbs or the outskirts,

The only sounds rustling wind, birds in trees,

Instead of this incessant urban hustle

I awake to every day, at crack of dawn.

No wonder I can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t deal

With this constant absence of real peace,

Underneath it all I’m clinging on to my hope

With what strength I still have left in me.

R. C. Greenlow

[10.08.2019]

DAY SIX : Wednesday, 09:28

In seemingly hardly any real time at all,

Look – behold how high up I stand tall!

Now is my time to finally glimpse the whole.

The complete picture, no fences, no wall.

No relent, no back-sliding, no flipside,

Watch and wait, mark these words mate!

Time will show words converted into actions,

That to my ultimate and total satisfaction,

Prove my time spent explaining all this

Was always worth it, like my own kind of justice.

Moving onwards evermore, of course,

I’m patient more and more as we go forward

And I’m learning not to question our unity,

Our unshakeable, unbreakable, amazing family.

R. C. Greenlow

[21.08.2019]

DAY SEVEN : Thursday, 02:01

So at long last, yet so very suddenly,

We have finally flowed through a whole week

Across a couple of months of the life of me!

I’m not special, except very much to myself,

Don’t care if that sounds pure selfish, it is what it is!

I am simply expressing in words the turns I’ve taken

In a very short passage of time, changing my mind

About the direction I want my vibration to chime,

And using bad energy inside transmuted into good vibes.

Behold the temple of light that is the essence of me, myself and I!

Shining brightly for anyone who cares to notice,

I’m off that shelf I left my life on a long time ago,

So now I’m burning warmly and happily and it’s pure nice!

I honestly believed struggling through this one life

Was the only way to get through to the other side,

Then I was noticed, re-guided, helped and advised.

Told simply to try transmuting my dark energy into light!

So simple, it seemed impossible, yet it took no real time at all,

To put into actual practice the good advice and solid guidance,

Of others who have trodden this path and got past their darkness

To arrive at that positive vibration, staying steadily in the ascendant.

That’s the next stage of this journey of mine,

And now I know the work is no way as hard as I had thought,

I’m really looking forward to every moment of growth

With a stronger heartbeat in my chest to propel me to my best.

The very best version of who I can potentially be is my aim,

It has no end goal, ascending will continue, as long as I stay true

To the continued methods and iron will that I have manifested

For myself, harvested from inner energy, with help at just the right time.

I give thanks and blessings to the Universe, to the precursors

Of my Rebirth and those who noticed me climbing, shared

Guidance to help me stop hiding behind outdated ways of thinking,

Which helped my sinking feelings convert into rising, to right where

I find myself at this very moment….right here!

Upful Risings,
Blessed Be,
One L:ove,
Peace, Love, Unity & Respect,

Each and every time.

R. C. Greenlow

[22.08.2019]

Copyright ©2019 R. C. Greenlow.

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